Great Comedian Jokes


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Oliver Hardy: ‘Didn’t you once tell me that you had an uncle?’
Stanley: ‘Sure, I’ve got an uncle. Why?’
Oliver: ‘Now we’re getting somewhere. Is he living?’
Stanley: ‘No. He fell through a trap door and broke his neck.’
Oliver: ‘Was he building a house?’
Stanley: ‘No, they were hanging him.’

 

 

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My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 now and we don’t know where the hell she is.’

Ellen DeGeneres

 

 

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‘I like to play chess with old men in the park, although it’s hard to find 32 of them.’

Emo Phillips

 

 

 

 

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The wife’s mother said: ‘When you’re dead, I’ll dance on your grave.’
I said: ‘Good. I’m being buried at sea.’

Les Dawson

 

 

 

 

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A few decades ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please don’t let Kevin Bacon die.’

Bill Murray

 

 

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