Must tell: Sports Jokes


Which course gives Tiger Woods the most trouble?

Which course gives Tiger Woods the most trouble?
Intercourse!

Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?

Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
In case he gets a hole in one.

 

 

Cricketers mindset:

Cricketers mindset:-

Ganguly: do or die.

Sehwag: do before you die.

Dravid: do until they die.

Tendulkar: do that will never die.

Laxman- Do when everyone else die.

Yuvraj – Do, die, reborn, do, die, reborn (repeat)….

Finally …

Dhoni – Do everything before luck die.

 

 

 

 

Three heavyweight men were going to commit suicide:

Three heavyweight men; an American, and an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building.

The American jumped off and shouted “God save America!”

The English man jumped off and shouted “God Save The Queen!”

The Sumo wrestler jumped off and shouted “God save the person who I land on!”

 

 

 

 

A Fishermen’s Tale:

Two men are fishing in a boat under a bridge and see a funeral procession starting across the bridge. One of the men stands up, takes off his cap and bows his head. The procession crosses the bridge, and the man puts on his cap, picks up his rod and reel and continues fishing.

His friend says, “That was touching. I didn’t know you had it in you.”

He responds, “Well, I guess it was the right thing to do — after all, I was married to her for 40 years.”

 

 

Where do Indian batsmen perform there best?

Where do Indian batsmen perform there best?
-In Advertisements.

What do baseball players put their food on?

 What do baseball players put their food on?
– Home plates.

It’s just like soccer

Guy: Wanna go out?
Girl: I have a boyfriend.
Guy: It’s just like soccer, just because there’s a goalie doesnt mean you cant score.

Why don’t grasshoppers watch soccer?

Why don’t grasshoppers watch soccer?
They watch cricket instead.

Why are baseball players so cool?

 Why are baseball players so cool?

They always have their fans around.

Why are football players never asked for dinner ?

Why are football players never asked for dinner ?
Because they’re always dribbling !

What tea do footballers drink ?

What tea do footballers drink ?
Penaltea !

Season’s more than half over :

Sarah was reading a newspaper while her husband was engrossed in a magazine. Suddenly, she burst out laughing. “Listen to this,”
she said. “There’s a classified ad here where a guy is offering to swap his wife for a season ticket to the stadium.”
“Hmmm,” her husband said, not looking up from his magazine.
Teasing him, Sarah said, “Would you swap me for a season ticket?”
“Absolutely not,” he said.
“How sweet,” Sarah said.
“Tell me why not.” “Season’s more than half over”, he said.

Archery contest:

Once upon a time there was an archery contest.

The first archer, wearing a long cape covering his face, lines up in position…

He takes a deep breath and fires an arrow which finds the center of the target.
Then he takes of his cape and screams:
I AM…… ROBIN HOOD!!! The crowd cheers!

The second archer with a cape lines up in position.
He fires his arrow which hits the center and cuts robin hood’s arrow into two!
He takes off his cape and screams:
I AM…… WILLIAM TELL!!!!
The crowd cheers!!

Finally, a third man in cape lines up in position…

He fires his arrow but it goes all wrong!!!
It flies past the crowd and kills the king!!!
Then the man takes off his cape and screams:
I AM…… SORRY!!!

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